BUT FOR THE GRACE OF GOD!
This proverb is an expression of
humility; in using it, a speaker acknowledges that outside factors (such as God's
grace, or his upbringing) have played a role in his success in life.
The adverbial phrase is often set
off with commas: "There, but for the grace of God, go I."
Origin
Allegedly from a
mid-sixteenth-century statement by John Bradford, "There but for the grace
of God, goes John Bradford", in reference to a group of prisoners being
led to execution.
Said when something bad that has
happened to someone else could have happened to you.
Used to acknowledge one’s good
fortune in avoiding another’s mistake or misfortune.
FACING A VIOLENT SITUATION, it is useful to search for professional guidance or groups and other solutions which can help give positive support. It doesn´t help at all to make a response of more violence or provoke more aggression.
But, how can we know who to trust? It can help to search through references or consultations with wise referrals, and by seeing the signs before us along the way.
Getting a divorce too early, or separating when other measures are possible, is not advisable either. The sanest solution is to search out resolutions before a monster is created. But, the problem is we tend to let things go until they are unmanageable. It is soooo important to see the warning signs and correct them in time.
When I was an adolescent I was in a
group of young rambunctious peers. We
were all basically good people, but we did not have the contention of adults,
and we were teenagers in a changing time, the late ´60´s and early ´70´s. We escaped from our homes because one of us
got a bad note at school. We were in an
older boy´s car late at night and a police officer stopped us. He took us to a detention home. Because we had been taken there, it was
stipulated that a Judge must decide about us.
The Judge decided to separate the group.
Two of the girls were sent to an Adoption Home in another town so that
they could ¨learn¨ from it and supposedly change their ways. One or two of the girls were left at the same
school. I was sent to another school at
a distance. Instead of working with the
group and helping us learn to deal with our environment, and finding out what
the problems were, they violently separated us.
We cared about each other. There
were many good aspects to our existence together. In my case, it hurt me greatly to be left
alone in a school where I didn´t know anyone, at that delicate age, and with a
personality which was already reserved and quiet. Looking back, I see how much it all damaged
my life. And we were basically ¨good¨
girls. Imagine how they handle real
problem people!
I remember back to when we lived in
Aberdeen, South Dakota. The Church had
just made a recreation center, and it would be for the young people
especially. I was 11 years old and so
happy to dance the Beatle´s music and do gym exercises with my friends. It was cut short when we moved to
Albuquerque, a Hub town, and crossroads.
None of that existed in Albuquerque, and I was thrown into the
void. No one was available to help me
through the difficult time of growing up!
I, personally, have found that
prayer and contemplation have been excellent tools, but I was in a cloud and
not aware of what was really happening. Awareness
and being conscious is so important.
It is so necessary to recognize weaknesses and one´s own faults. I am not talking about, say, the guilt of wearing a short dress, or smoking. Faults like not being prepared emotionally and qualified to deal with situations, etc. Faults like not taking charge of responsibilities for oneself, or prognosticating, not knowing how to reach out for solutions.
The virtues of the other person should also be recognized, and ability to build on them is paramount. A sincere inquiry of the situation and getting to the roots will help in resolving many problems that had seemed impossible.
GETTING TO THE ROOTS!
Even the Bible tells us to get to
the roots of problems in order to solution them. Only then can the ills
be shed off completely. Such a profound examination can take many, many
years, but it is often the only way to get growing to true success, instead of
taking the easy way out.
THE BIG PAYOFF!
We need something more. It
can´t be that the most of us are abused, used and poor. They who are
richest through unscrupulous actions often make a society of violence in which
they can take advantage of the weaker. Listening to propaganda, our
aching hearts thirst for truth. The masses turn to materialism, the
media, drugs, alcohol, or escape, while what is really needed according to
Anabella Ascar is ¨Spirit¨. This
contradiction of values causes violence in all of society.
We look about, hoping in those who still have youth. What does it mean to have many things if you are not healthy? Youth and health are so priceless!
Many thirst and hunger for something they need to take them to a way that is more important. So frustrated in not finding it in our institutions, schools, and yes, even churches, they turn to elements that cloud their vision. The violence takes over. They attempt to dominate, as they are even more dominated by the oppressive situation of unjust work situations, oppressive advertisements, and structures pressing on them.
A negative situation flows from one to another, and the weakest, unprepared to deal with situations and change them, become more and more trampled upon. However,
The tango is a dance which requires two partners moving in relation to
each other, sometimes in tandem, sometimes in opposition.[2] The meaning of
this expression has been extended to include any situation in which the two
partners are by definition understood to be essential -- as in, a marriage with
only one partner ceases to be a marriage.
To turn around an aggressive
situation, (especially when left unattended for much time), it can take years,
much effort, an important support system, and care. These elements are
rare to find, but it can be done. The same way each thought or action
forms, so do powerful storms! This all can be built over time, and it also
demands the efforts of the person who is underprivileged socially speaking.
It may take a quite a bit of social engineering to obtain building this
ideal structure! What are
the underlining complications in the situation?
Obviously, in a very extreme case of violence, often the only solution
is to separate the victim from the situation.
Many times a person makes a relationship with another who seems much more violent. This can happen perhaps because society is even more violent, and in some ways, they are searching for a protection from that greater violence. For example, a young woman who searches out a partner because her father was a drunk and beat her. As the situation progresses, getting more and more violent, based in materialism, the protector becomes the aggressor. It takes much patience and firmness to deal with such a situation, but it is possible, searching out support, and listening to the signs and answers that are there. A proficient Tango dancer learns with practice and skill!
If you read this carefully, you may be able to use it to get to an old age, like me, 39 years married, and with a bright, positive situation, (not perfect, but very good, and as I say, ¨The perfect gives way to goodness¨!), and be able to say, ¨But for the Grace of God, there goes I¨!!!